Kitten's Claws

Rawr. Mew. Purr. Hiss. But not necessarily in that order.

Growing Up.

In these next couple of days, three of my very close friends are leaving to further their studies and for work. Nadia and Sara are leaving to the UK, and Dr Amaleena (I totally have doctor friend, yo.) is leaving for Sabah to work there. As it is, Syar is in Australia for her studies, Jacqueline is in Canada for hers, and Su is often in Miri for work. Soon, Mawar too will be leaving for Australia. 

As some of you know, Tigah and I are already in a long distance relationship as he is currently in the States. And suddenly, a lot of whom I hold dear are leaving too- and I feel so incredibly alone.

I know it’s selfish to dwell on my loneliness when, given the opportunity they had, I too would (and will) leave this place. But I can’t help but feel deserted. And I’m holding on to Skype like my life depends on it.

Because it practically does. I don’t know how I would have survived these past 3 years being apart from Ian without Skype, and I don’t know how I can handle missing my girlfriends soon.

But as we sat around the mamak table, laughing our heads off over the silliest things, I recall what we were like in high school. The things we felt were important now seem so trivial and childish. The little fights we’d have, the gossips we shared. The drama that were shared (mostly by me). 
And I look at these girls now and think, wow. What wonderful women they’ve all turned out to be. They have always been the most intelligent girls I know, but now they’re also much stronger, more confident, and ready to take on the world. They’re my inspiration, my motivation. They’ve all seen how a crybaby like me grew up, and it wouldn’t have been possible without them.

So I’m struggling a bit, because suddenly my sisters won’t be around to smack me upside the head if/when I do something stupid. But at the same time, I feel, the years they’ve spent with me has prepared me for this moment.
And as I glimpse into my (hopefully not too imaginary) future, I look forward to the next phase of adulthood, when we gather for our weddings, and baby showers and children’s birthdays and hip replacement parties.

Because I believe the distance won’t sever our sisterhood. This is the kind of friendship that lasts a life time.

And I’m glad I have them to share that with me.

I will miss you girls so much. I love you all. 

  • 17 September 2011
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